I'm really looking forward to Sunday, . . as Ecclesiastes 7 has great wisdom for us as we navigate relationships.
I ran across this piece in Vox talking about the difficulty of adult friendships. As we all grow up, start our families, and attempt to buy our own house, we can unwittingly (or perhaps, on purpose) isolate ourselves and make it really hard to form friendships. Here are some quotes. . . I hope you'll read the whole thing here:
(notice one brief aside that begins the "living with people" segment. . .hmm. . it seems like God has provided a certain organization for us to meaningfully have tribes)
We are meant to have tribes, to be among people who know us and care about us.
And then people get married. They have kids. Their parents get older and need more care. They settle into careers. All those obligations — spouses, kids, family, work — are things we have to do. Friendships are things we choose to do. And that means, when time contracts and things get busier, friendships get bumped.
Those of you who are married with kids: When was the last time you ran into a friend or "dropped by" a friend's house without planning it? When was the last time you had a spontaneous encounter with anyone who was not a clerk or a barista, someone serving you?
We should recognize that by shrinking our network of strong social ties to our immediate families, we lose something important to our health and social identities, with the predictable result that we are ridden with anxiety and loneliness. We are meant to have tribes, to be among people who know us and care about us.